Hey guys, so im not even sure how to start this. Legal has ruined my life and i need help and support the most right now guys.
it started maybe a year and a half ago. my friends introduced me to tripple cs at first and that was amazing and even worse we started smoking Mad Hatter with it.
God was it amazing. It was like downing a 5th of liquor and not being sick for 24hrs.
that habit had almost took away my relationship with my gf and killed my best friends who did it more than me. it took them being hospitalized to scare us straight.
so we were sober off cs and legal only because the shop stopped selling it thank god. we were sober smoking just real bud for maybe 8 months?
Then we found out another shop had a different kind of legal something better than before. Its called Dreamcatcher. we started out slow 1 hit would do us for hours on end then we’d sleep like hell. it was good for awhile thought we had it in moderation.
Well this shit just isnt like what we had before. The high was completely different and better and that was bad. we wanted more and more. we went from a small bag every other day to a big bag everyday which is 40 dollars. ive ended up selling so much of my shit its sad.
So me and my 3 friends are quitting now and pretty much only because we dont have money to support it. Or thats what started it. Then we found out about the withdraws the hard way, cold turkying. it put 2 of my friends in the hospital bc of dehydration from not being able to eat and vomiting anything they consumed.
Well me and another friend wasnt worried bc we werent bad off like them. So we kept smoking it but trying in moderation.
Eventualy the other 2 started smoking again just as heavy even affter the er. Just to keep the withdraws away, to eat and sleep.
This shit has been controlling every point of our lives. Its been 1 day since i had a hit but before that a week. i know that was stupid but im finally feeling like im better but not sober. Maybe its because i got to smoke some high grade today.
All of us have been so deathly sick in between bags we finally said enough and been telling ourselves we will quit and been trying but its hard. so we all went in on 7gs and sat down for the first time in over 6 months for a real smoke sess. And it was a miracle we all feel better. My friends ate for the 1st time in a week and kept it down.
But as i find myself at this critical breaking point im losing the other half of my world that made me want to stop. As i write this my gf is leaving me. she doesnt know about my habit i dont know how ive hid it. but its obvious to her bc thats why its ending. ive been so lethargic and just not myself that she doesnt love me anymore. she doesnt love me bc that shit made me someone else.
The final straw was when she got off work again i was at my friends house today getting high. but for the 1st time it wasnt legal(she dont know). she says shes tired of me putting weed infront of her. well i have been but not weed its been the other shit. Im sure yall know how that is.
im not sure if i should finaly tell her the truth like it will matter now.
im absolutely done with this drug now. i feel it with every certainy in my being that i will become the person i was before Dreamcatcher took my personality. I know im not no where close through being over withdraws, and even though a blunt today helped us all to the point i cant describe how different i feel. its like i have a mind again.
i know in the morning it going to hit the only person who i loved or cared for is gone. and its gonna make it hard. They be other hard days to ill want to just go get another bag. But i know i wont.
This is my pledge to myself that me and my friends will kick this shit.
By the way im 19 and my friends are 19 20 and 21.
So ill be checking back here much much more. hopefully with a lil more support from you guys i can make it through this lowpoint and ensure to never ever relapse or try anything other than real weed again.
It has been maybe a week sense i first submitted my story, so this is a bit of an update.
One of my friends had a psychotic attack over his mom claiming he was smoking spice again even though he’s gone cold turkey. This put him into a rage and he started punching a wall without being able to control it. He went 2 days with a boxers break in two knuckles.
We realized from this our bodies are numb and dont feel pain like we should. Does anyone else have this problem?
None of us have had a hit and have all been in the hospital. My closest friend was admitted today because of panic attacks and almost not breathing. when i found out i rushed to his side and waited with him and a rha agent finally came in. She screened him and me at the same time even though i wasn’t admitted in to the er.
We were recommended to an open discussion group counseling in our area because there’s no specific rehab for spice in our location. It’s completely free to attend and your not forced to share. you can just sit in and get a lil knowledge on drug abuse which is good for anyone. So i recommend looking into if one of these open type of group counseling for anyone. Just knowing that im going to start attending is even more relief to my mind of being able to quit forever.
My withdraw symptoms are still here, but thankfully not as bad as my friends. I still can only sleep maybe 2 hours a night after being awake for maybe over 24 hours only to wake up and feel like im high on legal and start dry heaving. I still have no appetite and have to force myself to consume food for for the nutrients.
The only thing thats been making us feel a 100% normal is smoking real bud. Im still sure in my heart im completely done with this drug but i need every last bit of support i can get. This has been a really hard process and is for everyone.
I check in daily on this website. So comment and Pm me. Im here for anyone because sometimes it helps just to talk to another spice user trying to quit and know its possible. Good luck to everyone and know your not in it alone.