My story is a little different. I have always been the “experimenting” type, not necessarily easily influenced, but if it sounded like I could get away with it, hell, why not? I do try it, feel high, and then move on with my life …you know back to school, back to work kind of thing.
The first time I hit Spice wasn’t even intentional. It just so happens to want some marijuana when my younger brother was puffing something that looked like a weed blunt.
I didn’t know where I was & was deathly afraid that I had gotten lost or something.
Well, it came down after only about five minutes of me struggling to grasp a hold of reality, which seemed like it could have been a lifetime, to be honest, at that moment I didn’t know what the hell I had just hit. I was just glad it was over.
Fast forward; April 2016
I take a couple of puffs of a spice blunt just because my girlfriend had it and my head starts spinning, & immediately I began to get hungry.
The idea was that I’m going to hit this K2 grab a bite to eat, and I have to be at work, later on, today, well spice had other plans.
For the first couple months, I’d gets off work & buy a cheap five or ten dollar bag, roll as many blunts as I could & get “zooted”; that’s what we called the high, my friends and me.
It was making me eat like crazy & I thought I could use the few extra pounds. I’d eat everything, even foods I wasn’t interested. I was so miserable from eating, most nights I couldn’t even sleep because of side effects.
On the second month, somehow I forgot to update my parking sticker &lost my car.
On the third month, I remembered things in chunks. When my boyfriend would ask me about something that had just occurred, I could hardly recall it ever happened in my head.
HE was the one losing it, even when I had no money to feed my cat in June; he was the one losing it. When I couldn’t afford my phone bill in July, it was everybody else who had the problem.
Only the thing was, their problem wasn’t with them, their problem was with me. I was spiraling out of control and didn’t even know it.
I forgot how to smile or laugh things off, and was mad all the time. There was no life in my eyes, & tried as I might. My body refused to let out a complete yawn.
I was a zombie, it wasn’t until I woke up one day with no vehicle, no job, no money, and I’m walking down the main street, struggling to walk, mind racing 1000 mph about how I’m going to get my next high that I realize something isn’t right.
I felt like I was missing a link, and for the life, I could not reconnect it.
I woke up in the middle of the night last week in a cold sweat, vomiting up everything in my stomach. I could not breathe, see, hear, and the more emotion I felt, the more I struggled to find my words.
It was as if I was imploding and I wanted more than anything to break free. My body let out a sort of wail. I was screaming…sounds crazy? Yes, I know! In the middle of the night, in the middle of my boyfriend’s apartment, I was screaming to the top of my lungs. Was I sure I was dying?
Luckily for me, my boyfriend was there to take me to the hospital. At which time I “failed” to mention that I recently smoked K2. During that week of withdrawals, my body was out of control.
I was shaking uncontrollably; I had tunnel vision, hot flashes, and then chills. I was back & forth in and out of reality, I was hallucinating, and saw terrible things every time closed my eyes.
Since the doctor didn’t know what was going on, I was flushed with four iv bags, one for each day; I was there & given pain meds & meds to calm me down.
Needless to say, I am alive and synthetic marijuana is out of my system. I am a freaking nervous wreck now. You call my name, I jump, and any loud noise startled any sudden movements in almost jumping out of my skin.
I can’t even wake up to my alarm without panicking. Hell if I move too fast I’m afraid.
Those “friends” of mine! Junkies…flat out. They were never my friends. They too were chasing a high.
The whole experience was devastating!
Even though I have to take several dosages of anxiety meds throughout the day, life is so beautiful and bright on the other side :).
I’m myself again. I can laugh now! I am unjustifiably happy! I can focus on more than a five seconds; my mind is racing faster than my body. I mean I can finally take a walk down the road, and it doesn’t feel like a task!
People, I was filled with a joy so intense once I ultimately came down. I praised his name for about thirty minutes nonstop & right before this whole trip I was self-proclaimed “non-religious”. Haa!
When spice takes over, it pushes your life out. It steals your soul. God Loves You! You’re killing yourself, and you have to stop now.♡