Hello, my name is Tasha and I’m 23.
My baby daddy – he would get the title of something nicer if he were nicer – after 2 kids & 8 years, it’s all done thanks to spice.
He has a history of typical “bad boy ways” – tattoos, occasional drugs. But when our first child was born, he was a new man.
He only smoked a little green from time to time, but a recent accident led him to become addicted to prescription meds.
I loved him. He was the best he could ever be.
Finally, after such a long hard struggle with perk 30’s, I really thought he wouldn’t pick up another habit, at least for our kids.
But he did, and now every day I pay.
His famous words: “ur gonna pay, u whore… I’m sick of u fucking bitch… it’s all your fault!!” & many more mean and unnecessary nasty names.
Not only has it altered his ways, but now he can’t even function normally in society.
If we don’t have the $12 for his spice and blunts, he manipulates every person or situation to get what he wants.
If he can’t go at least once every hour or two that he’s awake and smoke his spice, he screams and yells and lays for hours in the bathtub.
He won’t even take his clothes off in the tub.
He’s so sick, he doesn’t even have time to take them off. So every day, I have a load of laundry to wring out or he will leave the piles and piles of clothes on the floor until a wet/moldy stench arises.
Makes me want to run away and cry.
Every family outing is chaotic. He has put so much stress on us from verbal abuse and even physical (when it’s a real bad day).
He puts everything on me, says everything is my fault, no one likes me & all that. Every day he puts me down, all in front of our two boys, 6 & 4… who really need a good dad as a role model again, not a psycho.
I need help… he needs help… idk what to do: walk away, for my children’s sake? or hang in there?
No one ever changes back, but God works in mysterious ways.
I just want the working dad we knew and loved back then, not the dad who saves a month’s worth ($500 worth) of empty spice bags as a prized collection.
It’s hard getting your income taken from you and being threatened to get out of your own house. I pay all the bills! He doesn’t work, not in a year now.
Now, I just get threatened every day.
I don’t do this to him… I encourage him to get clean.
After plenty of my own research, we both know the problem is spice. He always denies it though.
One day, I had him in tears as I read 100’s of comments online from people just like him… bad reaction to spice, and once you’re addicted it gets worse. Some still smoke, some don’t… but all have one thing in common: bathing compulsively and severe abdominal pain.
The ones who are able to safely quit smoking say after a week or two will never go back to spice. No sickness, nothing.
They can do it – why can’t he?
Doctors call it cannabinoid hypermesis.
They say it’s hard to be diagnosed with this, but reading the stories and spice tales from hundreds of people, obviously this is more common than the world really knows.
Still, here it remains legal in every convenience store.
I’m so stressed.
I just want all of you out there, if you haven’t ever tried it, don’t.
Just think next time u reach in your pocket and nothing is there. Think what your life and the lives of those around you would be like if you were sick – deathly ill, pain and puking in the streets, falling over, can’t even stand, hurts so bad it makes a grown man cry for a shower…. and you have lied to everyone you know to scam them out of $$ //
… and no way to get better.
Everyday this is what the father of my children has to feel. Due to one bad choice, to smoke the legal stuff so there’s no traces in a drug test.
Spice is a killer. My broken heart can only take so much.