I started using spice around 2011-2012.
We called it bim, but that was a very localized name for it here.
I’ve been clean for around 2-3 years now.
I don’t remember much from the time I was using.
I had two bouts with the drug, and almost died a few times.
I know many others with a “that time I almost died on spice” story.
You don’t realize you’re addicted to spice until you stop. You look back and see how much it controlled your life.
Quitting it was hard. I didn’t quit it for good until my boyfriend at the time got arrested.
Nothing makes you realize you have to change when you’re crouching behind a dumpster at your church sneaking a hit.
It took another three months to really be done. My ex got out clean and told me that we were addicted.
Spice consumed everything i was and had in life. I’ve done a few kinds of drugs all recreationally and nothing was ever like spice.
It strips you of who you are. Your thoughts. Your being. That’s why you don’t realize you’re addicted.
It’s not that you have to have it, it’s just so cheap and easy to get – so you just do. You just always have it. You always smoke it.
You don’t do anything until you’ve lit up first. Then, you still don’t do anything because suddenly you’re trapped in your head and keep getting higher and higher to chase that revelation that you just know has to be there.
You get dragged into the lowest and darkest places in your mind.
Next thing you know, you’ve walked ten miles just to buy another pack and are passed out in a ditch on the beach, talking nonsense and tripping out.
It’s been a long time and I am only just now becoming myself again.
I don’t have much advice in how to stop, other than to just do it. Look at yourself and realize you aren’t you anymore.
It’s probably not well-advised, but I smoked weed while i was quitting. A lot of weed. The real stuff. It takes the edge off.
Ease yourself back into the real world. It’s not an easy path.
Addiction never is.
Find support and get help.
Submitted Stories
“I had two bouts with Spice, and almost died a few times” – Willow Page
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