This is going to be a long story. So, forgive me for that. I just want you should see the full story.
I used to smoke marijuana with my friends. In 2013, I was twenty. So, that would be five years ago. I have insomnia, depression, and had lost a lot in a short amount of time. Of course, I was attempting to escape everything through getting high. Besides, it helped me sleep.
In the winter, it became harder to find marijuana. So, naturally, my friends had an idea of something similar. Care to take a guess at what it was? That’s right, it was K2/incense. I had very little knowledge about the substance. However, I assumed they wouldn’t steer me wrong. Oh, how naive and stupid I was.
We used that way more than we should have. The first time alone should have clued me into how bad this stuff was, but I was adamant on staying “gone.” My first time left me so high, I felt like I was going to throw up and die. I was rocking back and forth on my couch, wide-eyed, and staring at the wall. I came down and passed out about an hour or two later. We continued smoking blunts of it on later days.
The number of days, broken up and not every day, added up to a month.
Late December, one friend offered a new batch he had acquired. We smoked it. Three days later, I woke up unable to breathe correctly, panicking, chest tight and in pain, no balance, disoriented, and obviously scared out of my mind. It was horrible.
I was driven to the emergency room. After what seemed like forever, I calmed down. Yet I was still shaken up. The doctor told me they diagnosed it as K2 induced anxiety. I asked what I could do about it. He said, he wasn’t actually sure, but he had a few suggestions to try.
You see, they weren’t able to trace the substances, because they could have some chemical bases. Commonly used medications included hardcore drugs. Yes, like heroin, meth, crack/cocaine, and many others. So, they could only work with the symptoms they have already seen before.
Naturally, I was just utterly shocked.
He ended up prescribing anti-anxiety meds. After this, I was released. I began having a few normal panic attacks a week. I tried the meds, but they actually caused my seizures to be worse. I don’t know why.
After about a month, my attacks began to evolve. They started happening violently, and more often, yet randomly. This continued until I had one almost every day. They were so severe, it was thought that I was having seizures.
I would twitch or thrash. My arms would lock up, my hands would lock up so much I thought my fingers would break. I would have tingling, numbness and/or extreme pressure. It would start in my hands/arms, and sometimes in my legs too. In the more severe attacks, this feeling would travel to my chest, and even to my head. Also, I would get freezing, and my mouth would get very dry.
This event would be so painful that I would scream and cry. It always embarrassed me, and depressed me, afterward.
Most of the time, it would take friends or family sitting with me, talking, just to help me out of it. I would apologize to them about having to deal with it and thank them for their help.
Almost seven months later, they became much less frequent. I was still able to do what I needed to do, and I was able to get a job. However, a month into it, I started having anxiety issues again. This time when driving, and away from home. It became a significant problem.
Eventually, I couldn’t drive to work. So, I asked a friend for rides to work. This worked for a while but didn’t last. I started having anxiety attacks while riding in other cars. Needless to say, I lost my job.
After all of this, it was apparent I needed help. This needed to change, fast. I began seeing specialists; neurologists, and psychologists/therapists. After countless attempts and tests, nothing was working. Not therapy, not meds, not coping skills, nothing. MRI’s showed nothing, EKG’s showed normal vitals (when I wasn’t in an attack). I was told it was all in my head, and I could just get over it if I tried. Of course, this was cruel, degrading, and didn’t help at all.
It got to the point I couldn’t even walk down the street. I became housebound for two years! Eventually, I was able to push out a little. I got a small job that was very close to home and made very little money. Yet, my anxiety was still ruling my every decision and move.
I moved jobs, and stayed there for almost a year, with only having one severe attack there. I lost it shortly before a year.
At last, my anxiety came back. I’ve lost friends and family, my dating life is non-existent. I’ve lost the ability to even go to work again. I still can’t seem to find something to help. I don’t know what to do; I’ve run out of ideas. If it wasn’t for a few close families, I don’t know where I would be. I don’t feel like me. I was before this stuff turned my life, my world, my very consciousness upside down and inside out.
I implore everyone, do not do this stuff. It will ruin everything and alter your mind in the worst way. As you now know, it did with me.