Personally I think every case is going to have some similarities and differences.
This has been my experience: I started smoking “Incense” (what I came to know it as) in 2010 just to kill time with my friends.
5 years later it has cost me those friends (and more), thousands of dollars that I wasted on that stuff, and TWO good careers.
Now I am unemployed, with little to no prospects, but at the very least for the first time in a long time, I feel good about who I CAN become going forward.
I am currently about 6 days sober (cold turkey), and It has been the longest week of my life.
I decided to quit cold turkey on my birthday, this past Sunday at 4:30 pm, when I took my last miserable hit of some shit that was having no effect on me anymore (I had become immune to it).
I already had an idea of what I was in for. I had successfully quit cold turkey (or so I thought) three months prior.
These were the withdrawal symptoms I experienced then, as well as now:
- I couldn’t keep water down the first two days
- I was drenched in sweat
- every time I would vomit, I would get the chills immediately after I was done.
- needless to say I lost my appetite and it would take 4 days for it to return.
- I didn’t care about anything
I didn’t celebrate my birthday, which was the day after I decided to quit smoking for good.
I didn’t bother to show up to work or even call to explain why; I was fired after 2-3 days of this.
My blood pressure and heart beat both rose dramatically, which started to worry me because I had been for the most part a healthy person, other than the two week binge of incense I decided to partake in after I fell off the wagon when I had reached 3 months sober in early July.
In the 6 days following my decision to quit, I became very pale, couldn’t stop shaking, did not sleep at all the first 4 days, slept very little the following 2, and I lost 15 lbs dropping from a healthy 180 to a gaunt 165. (I’m 6′ tall btw).
Now I’m eating, but my bowel movements are diarrhea.
I know this will continue for at least the rest of the day and possibly into tomorrow, but it is the last step in my withdrawl process.
Once I get past this, I know I will have recovered.
That’s how it was when I had quit 3 months earlier.
It is a sick twisted hell I have to go through, but the alternative is to continue to be a slave to this drug that is destroying my life.
Hopefully I can stay sober this go around, but my mental weakness is what got me into the drug in the first place, and what has thus far kept me going back.
Addiction is not something most people beat on their own. I honestly thought I had 3 months ago, but it wasn’t true.
This time around, I’ve involved my family and friends, so that they can give me strength when I am weak.
I hope to God it works this time around.
I really don’t enjoy sober life, but I do enjoy not throwing my money way, wasting my time, destroying my health, and alienatintg my friends and family from me.
Hope my story helps someone going thru the struggle.
Either way, I needed to get that off my chest.